Have an inner conversation with your inner aspects to get to the root of your trauma.


  1. Identify the different aspects of your inner Self.
    Identify one aspect of your personality that you’re ashamed or fearful of. Do you feel extremely critical, judgmental, worthless, or suicidal? “What makes you feel this way?” Your mind will bring up an image that represents your trauma. If you’re feeling depressed, you may see a whimpering child. If you’re very critical, you may see an angry old woman.

  2. Ask yourself how you feel about a particular aspect of your personality.
    Let’s say you’re terrified of the critical part of you. Ask yourself, “How do I feel about this mean critic inside me?”  Be honest with your response. This allows you to separate yourself from the critic and access your underlying aspect.

  3. If your response is extreme, ask that aspect to step back temporarily.
    Let’s say you respond with, “I hate my critical side. It reminds me of my mother.” This is a sign that the critical aspect is trying to protect you from further trauma and blocking your access to the traumatic memories. Therefore, ask it to step back temporarily to allow you to see what it is protecting. Once it does so, thank and assure it that it can return whenever needed.

  4. Ask yourself how you feel about the aspect that has stepped aside.
    You may respond, “I wonder why it’s so angry and vengeful.” Spend some time getting to know this critical aspect of you. Ask how old it is and how it came to be so angry and critical. Getting better acquainted with this aspect will show that it doesn’t always need to protect you.

  5. Step in and liberate the traumatized aspect that was previously hidden.
    Once your protective aspect has stepped back and you’ve shown it compassion, you’ll see the inner child that was traumatized. You may recall a memory of being severely beaten as a child. Visualize yourself rushing to this child, hugging it, and taking it to a safe place. Visualize threatening the abuser and tell them never to touch the child again. You have now reworked the traumatizing incident and liberated yourself.

  6. Repeat steps 1 to 5 for any other aspects of your personality that you may be ashamed or fearful of.


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