Effectively persuade people


  1. See each person as someone full of hidden surprises to be uncovered. 
  2. Ask questions, notice what lights them up, and direct your conversation accordingly.
    The more they talk, the more you’ll learn about their desires and insecurities.
  3. Infect people with the right mood.
    If you’re warm, relaxed, and indulgent, the other party will sense and mirror this.
  4. Confirm the opinions they express about themselves. 
  5. Appeal to their sense of independence by asking for their advice
    Position the favor as something they want.
  6. Appeal to their intelligence by agreeing with their viewpoint.
    This will make them more likely to agree with you later.
  7. Appeal to their goodness by linking your request to a greater cause and reminding them of good things they did in the past.
  8. Allay their insecurities by praising the qualities they’re most insecure about. 
  9. Focus on their effort, not talent.
  10. Use their stubbornness by channeling their emotions constructively
    Agree with their views so they’ll rebel in the opposite direction


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