Become immune to diminishing leaders

Instructions

  1. Respond with intellectual curiosity.
    Take the perspective of the diminishing leader and ask yourself questions like: “Why are they worried?”, “What do they need from me to feel confident and in control of their business?” Or, simply, “What causes an otherwise decent human being to act like a Diminisher?” With your ego set aside, you might notice and appreciate their strengths or feel less angry. And with this insight, you can then work in a more cooperative spirit that smooths ruffled feathers and makes everyone less defensive.

  2. Remind yourself that it’s not necessarily about you.
    Although you’re the one feeling the pain, your actions aren’t necessarily the root cause. The Diminisher’s behavior is more likely a function of the pressure they feel from above or the residual effects of ineffectual role models from their past.

  3. Take the high road.
    Choose to maintain high expectations for yourself despite your leader’s diminishing behavior. Do your best work and admit your mistakes. The diminishing may continue, but you can choose to mitigate its destructive effect.

  4. Strengthen other connections.
    Increase your connections to different people and work. If you can’t get inside the Diminisher’s trust circle, build other circles of influence. This will help build your confidence and may even give you the courage to provide feedback to your diminishing leader.

  5. Lead your leader.
    If you want them to utilize you at your best, you’ll need to guide them. You can be your own agent and advocate for your capabilities. Be assertive when necessary, and defend yourself from well-meaning but overbearing management.

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