Defend your attention so real conversations can happen

A small product team kept missing early warning signs. Stand-ups were speedy, laptops open, phones face-up. They piloted a 20-minute “clear pocket” three times a week. Laptops closed, phones in a tray, meeting moved to a quieter corner. They opened with, “Best and hardest part of this sprint?” and ended on time.

Within two weeks, a designer shared a nagging concern about an integration that later saved a two-week slip. People reported feeling strangely calmer. One said the silence after the opener felt awkward at first, like standing on a dock at night, but then the water looked clearer.

At home, a parent introduced a nightly device basket during dinner. The first few nights were bumpy. The TV remote sat untouched, like a small test of will. By week two, the kids started offering “rose, thorn, bud” without prompting. Stories lengthened. Bedtime went faster because arguments dropped.

Attention science is blunt: divided attention degrades comprehension and empathy. Even the presence of a silent phone on the table reduces conversational depth. Sound levels matter too, with noisy rooms pushing people toward small talk. A daily pocket of full attention isn’t about perfection, it’s a small, reliable container for real connection.

Pick one 20-minute block each day where you’ll remove devices from sight and lower background noise. Move to a quieter spot if you can, and open with a simple ritual question like “Best and hardest part of today?” Use a visible cue—a basket or airplane mode—to make the commitment tangible. Keeping it short, consistent, and calm will help everyone trust the pocket. Try it for the next five days and notice what surfaces.