Choose your five, form a mastermind, and let association lift you

When Maya listed her core five people, the pattern surprised her. Two lifted her relentlessly, one was neutral, and two left her tense after every chat. She didn’t need to judge anyone, but she did need to adjust time and topics. She invited one lifter to a monthly coffee on the first Friday. Then she told a drainer she’d be less available for venting and suggested short, focused catch‑ups instead.

Next, she pulled together three peers for a simple mastermind. They met on Zoom for 60 minutes, monthly. Each shared one goal, the input they were tracking, and one stuck point. They ended with a single commitment for the next thirty days, posted in a shared note. The calls were practical, a little awkward at first, then energizing. Her phone buzzed with a reminder before each session, and she found herself prepared.

She also reached out to someone two steps ahead—a manager she respected—and asked for a 15‑minute call with one precise question. The conversation was short and generous. Maya sent a thank‑you note and shared a result thirty days later. That follow‑through built trust quickly.

Social psychology shows that norms and expectations shape behavior. When you choose “lifters,” set boundaries with “drainers,” and create structured support, your habits improve with less willpower. A mastermind multiplies learning and accountability, and mentoring compresses your learning curve. In plain terms, the people around you make your default choices better.

This week, write down your five closest contacts and note how you feel after time with each, then invite one lifter to a monthly coffee and set a simple boundary with one drainer to protect your focus. Gather three peers for a one‑hour monthly mastermind where you share one goal, one input metric, and one roadblock, and close with a clear commitment. Ask a mentor a single specific question and follow up with results thirty days later. Be the lifter in every room you enter. Put the first coffee on your calendar now.