Decide by joy and thank what you release to avoid regret

You pick up a sweater and your shoulders drop just a bit, as if your body is whispering, not this one. Then you grab a soft T‑shirt and your chest lifts. It’s subtle, like the difference between stale and fresh air. Sit with the sensation for a second longer than usual. The kettle clicks off in the kitchen. Let your hand decide before your head piles on stories about price tags, gifts, and “maybe someday.”

Regret loves unfinished endings, so give a short thank-you to the items you release. “You were perfect for that internship,” or “You taught me that beige washes me out.” It sounds odd until you feel the pinch in your chest loosen. A client once kept a chipped mug because her grandfather gave it to her. She took a photo, told a story about weekend cocoa, then donated it. Two weeks later, she started using the blue mug she’d been saving for company, and mornings tasted different.

Create a tiny place of honor for the five items that make you light up without effort. A photo, a scarf, a small figure. Seeing them daily trains your nervous system to recognize genuine yes. I might be wrong, but when people practice this, they shop less, because the contrast between joy and obligation becomes obvious.

Under the hood, this is interoception, your ability to read internal signals. It’s also loss aversion flipped with gratitude: when you name the gain you already received, the “loss” of the object shrinks. And it’s identity-based decisions in action. You’re not just asking, “Do I need this?” You’re asking, “Does this belong to who I’m becoming?”

Hold each item and pay attention to your body’s first signal—keep what brings a small lift and release what feels heavy. When you let something go, speak a one-sentence thank-you that names the lesson or moment it gave you so your mind closes the loop. Gather a handful of unmistakably joyful items in one visible spot to sharpen your sense of yes. Use this mini-shrine as a daily calibration, then repeat the joy test on the next batch. Try it with ten items after dinner.