Praise that teaches and criticism that sticks beat polite noise

You’ve probably sat through the “nice–critique–nice” sandwich and felt the middle spoil the whole thing. Your brain learned nothing. The fix is quick: spell out the situation, the behavior, and the impact, then stop talking. The next time your teammate nailed a demo, say, “In today’s call, your two‑line summary let the CTO jump straight to a decision.” They instantly know what to repeat. When something’s off, keep the same frame: “In yesterday’s doc, the risk section didn’t list owners, which made follow‑ups stall.” Clear, short, human.

Do it fast. Waiting a week turns small adjustments into rescues. When feedback lands within a day, people still remember the specifics, so the change costs less energy. Deliver it in person if you can. Your voice carries calm that text can’t. One manager told a designer at 5 p.m., “In the hero image, the CTA blends into the background, which will cut clicks. I’ll sit with you for ten minutes to try two bolder options.” They fixed it before dinner.

The goal isn’t to win a debate, it’s to help better work appear tomorrow. Ask a question at the end like, “What’s something I’m missing?” or “What would make this easier?” That keeps agency with the person doing the work and surfaces constraints you can clear. If you’re worried about sounding harsh, remember that vagueness is harsher, because people can’t tell what to change. Honesty with specifics is kindness.

Cognitively, SBI reduces ambiguity, which eats working memory. Socially, pairing a short fix with a help offer keeps belonging high. Over time, the team’s shared language compresses feedback cycles and makes excellence feel normal. Your coffee won’t go cold waiting for the same errors to happen again.

Today, give one person one line of SBI praise and one person one line of SBI criticism, both in person or on video. Keep each under twenty seconds, then offer a small, concrete help like a quick review or a sample. Close with a question to check if you missed context. Don’t write an essay, don’t cushion with extra fluff, and don’t wait for ‘the right moment.’ The right moment is right after the work happens. You’ll notice the next version improving—and the gratitude when people realize you’re helping them win. Try it before your next meeting ends.