How Concealing Your Intentions Prevents Sabotage (and Builds Influence)

Carla keeps finding her big ideas shot down at committee meetings or her room assignments mysteriously changed before she even has a say. She vents, ‘It’s like someone’s always two steps ahead—how do they know what I want before I do?’ Her mentor, an unflappable administrator who’s survived decades of campus politics, has a simple explanation: ‘Carla, you’re too transparent. Once people know what you really want, they’ll either run to block you or find a way to get there first.’

Carla resists—honesty is a virtue, right? But she soon notices that the most successful students and teachers in her circle are also the most elusive about their personal priorities. One always keeps a calm, unreadable smile. Another talks at length, but only about vague, universal goals. When pressed, they offer soft redirections or mention hobbies that have little connection to campus power. Carla tries the approach herself, simply discussing ‘wanting to contribute where she’s needed’ rather than broadcasting her top choices. To her surprise, she encounters less resistance and fewer ‘miraculous coincidences’ where she loses out at the last second.

Behaviorally, this technique is called strategic ambiguity: by narrowing what others know, you protect yourself against sabotage and gain flexibility. In organizations, the deliberate use of ambiguity is shown to reduce internal rivalry and keep control over decision-making.

Start by getting comfortable with holding back just a bit—before you announce your goals or preferences at meetings or with family, remind yourself that details can always be added later, but they can’t be retracted. If you need to respond, stick with broad statements or even shift the conversation to a related but harmless interest. And remember, once your plan is complete or the group function is over, you can reveal your intent—by then, it’s too late for anyone to block your progress. Try this with a small personal project as a test.