You Are Not Your Thoughts or Your Feelings—Discover the Power of the Observing Self

Modern life is noisy. Notifications, voices, and your own inner commentary vie for your attention all day. When things go wrong—a social misstep, a bad grade, a harsh comment—thoughts can ricochet around your mind, telling you that you’re not enough, or replaying the same anxieties like a broken tape. It’s easy to believe you are those thoughts or to get stuck in whatever story is loudest.

But there is another way of being: learning to notice your thoughts and feelings as an observer, not just a participant. The observing self is the part of you that steps back and simply watches whatever your mind and body are doing. In one small moment, you can notice 'my shoulders are tense,' or 'there’s the worry again'—and in that instant, you’re bigger than any thought or emotion.

This capacity to observe is always with you, even if you forget about it most of the time. When you shift into observing, even for a minute, you loosen the grip your thoughts and feelings have on behavior. You might be surprised by how fast tension drains away when you name what you’re experiencing instead of becoming it. This isn’t some esoteric self-help trick; it’s a well-documented process in neuroscience and clinical psychology, foundational to mindfulness and resilience training.

At any point today, stop for sixty seconds and close your eyes. Let thoughts, images, and feelings arise, and every time you notice one, label it gently and remind yourself there’s a part of you that’s just observing. You can focus on how your socks feel or notice the hum of an air conditioner to anchor your awareness. Each time you return to this observer role, you train your mind to grant yourself space from inner chatter. Try this at least once while waiting for your next class, on the bus, or before sleep.