Ask Yourself Yes-or-No Questions to Build Real Habits

Most people pledge to improve—eat better, exercise, call family—then watch good intentions fade by mid-week. Behavioral science reveals why: intentions become action, and action becomes identity, when choices are made binary. By framing your intended action as a yes/no question (rather than a vague promise), you force your mind to confront the gap between aspiration and behavior.

This effect, called the question-behavior effect, is especially powerful when 'yes' would bring you closer to who you want to be. It triggers discomfort at inconsistency (cognitive dissonance) and nudges action. Asking “Will I do this?”—not “Can” or “Would”—compels commitment. When you record your answers and invite others to check in, accountability multiplies.

From world leaders to athletes to everyday people, those who adopt direct yes/no questions see their goals gain teeth. It might feel awkward or confrontational—but it works.

Tonight, make a list of one or two habits you want to solidify and rewrite each as a yes/no question: 'Will I read for 10 minutes?' or 'Will I avoid screens after 10 pm?' Each morning, answer honestly and review at night—no storytelling or excuses, just yes or no. Rope in a friend, coach, or family member to ask you as well, supporting your resolve and building momentum. You’ll be surprised how such a simple shift spikes your consistency and lets you see where you’re fooling yourself. Give it a shot for a week and track what changes.