Set Stretch Goals That Are Hard but Not Impossible—It’s a Skill, Not a Gift

In team meetings, the question of 'How hard should our goals be?' sparks vigorous (sometimes tense) debate. Some tend to set easy goals to guarantee success and avoid embarrassment, while others reach for the stars and consistently fall short. But over time, the most effective groups learn how to tune their aspirations—not by guessing, but by rating their confidence on a simple scale: one means no chance, ten means a sure thing. The Goldilocks zone? Right in the middle, where you’re a little bit nervous but still energized to try.

One marketing team, for example, uses color-coded dots next to each quarterly target to indicate confidence. Goals with too many tens get reset upward; those with a string of ones get trimmed until the team has about a coin flip’s chance. At first, this sparks anxiety, but then progress accelerates—and meetings become less about making excuses and more about actions. Even setbacks are discussed with candor, since everyone agreed to aim for challenge, not certainty.

Cognitive research finds that motivation peaks when our goals are just out of comfortable reach—what educational psychologists call the 'zone of proximal development.' Effective leaders and learners consistently recalibrate, keeping ambitions bold, but not off the cliff.

When you’re setting goals—on your own or with a team—take time to rate your confidence on a scale from one to ten. Anything above a seven is too safe; anything below a three needs adjusting. Aim for that 50% sweet spot, the stretch that’s just hard enough to be motivating but not crushing. Once you’ve set it, announce your discomfort (and excitement) out loud or in writing, then get to work. Don’t settle for easy, but don’t punish yourself with impossible. Try this on your next big assignment or group project.