Go All In on Painful Changes—Don’t Minimize or Delay the Inevitable

Dragging out painful decisions feels safer—small steps, half-measures, testing the waters. But, whether it’s layoffs, ending a partnership, or closing a project, this halfway approach almost always makes things worse. The people involved sense uncertainty and spend weeks in anxiety. Productivity plummets, uncertainty spreads, and trust erodes.

Most who’ve led teams or managed tough situations can recall the relief—sometimes, surprisingly, on both sides—when a clear, decisive step was finally taken. After the sting of a hard announcement, the energy shifts toward adapting, rebuilding, or moving on. Anxiety and gossip fade, and people start to focus on what’s next. Scientific studies on change and emotional recovery support this—recovery from a clear negative event is faster than limbo or repeated small setbacks.

This principle also plays out in childhood—kids learn that pulling off a bandage in one go hurts but brings swift relief, while inching it off prolongs the discomfort. It’s no different among adults managing change: clear cuts hurt now but heal faster.

If you’re stuck, dreading a necessary but painful move, focus your energy on doing it fully, not in bits and pieces. Once you’ve named the issue honestly—to yourself first, then to others—commit to acting swiftly and completely. Speak with respect, but with clarity, and be present to help others handle the change. Avoid second-guessing by remembering that fast, honest action closes the wound and lets everyone, including you, heal and move forward. Try it the next time something hard but clear surfaces in your life.