Multitasking’s Hidden Toll—Why Mothers' Time Is Fractured and Fathers' Often Isn’t

Research consistently finds that parenting—especially for mothers—means juggling: prepping dinner while taking a work call; filling out school forms while managing a squabble; answering texts while supervising baths. This 'multitasking' is not just about doing many things at once but about constantly switching emotional and cognitive gears. Studies show that, on average, mothers spend up to ten extra hours each week multitasking compared to fathers, and that these hours are the most stressful and least satisfying. Fathers, by contrast, are more likely to single-task during their personal or parenting time. Not surprisingly, mothers are much more likely to report feeling ‘always rushed’ and rarely get the feeling of completion or rest—even when the house is finally quiet. This hidden cost isn’t just about productivity; it erodes well-being and the sense of identity outside of parenting. Understanding this pattern is the first step to challenging it.

Spend one day noticing and jotting down every hour you try to do more than one thing at once—notice especially those transition windows where stress spikes. Circle any time you felt your blood pressure rise or your thoughts scatter. Pick the period that trips you up most (maybe the hour before dinner), and experiment: give yourself permission to focus only on one thing—even if messes or delays stack up elsewhere. Reflect at day's end. Did your stress dip or spike? Try this small shift again tomorrow. Let yourself be changed by what you learn.