Dissociation Is Not Just 'Spacing Out'—Learn to Harness Grounding Before You Disappear

You’re sitting in a crowded room, but everything sounds slightly muffled, your vision blurs at the edges, and you float behind your eyes like a goldfish in a bowl. No one else seems to notice as you quietly check out. Maybe it’s a boring lecture, a tense argument, or a moment when old memories threaten to stir up too much pain. Later, you realize you don’t remember whole chunks of the day—or time keeps skipping.

For those who have been through serious or repeated stress, this isn’t just losing focus, but a form of dissociation—a brain’s emergency escape hatch. In IFS and trauma therapy, these dissociative parts are seen as specialized protectors. Instead of blaming or fighting them, the first breakthrough is learning to name early signs. The next is grounding—reconnecting your body and senses with the present. Maddie, a college student, noticed dissociation creeping up whenever she had to speak aloud in class. She practiced wriggling her toes and gripping her water bottle, naming the spacey feeling and thanking the part for trying to keep her safe. With time, grounding made the episodes shorter and recovery faster.

Science suggests that the act of saying thank you, and physically anchoring in the present, quite literally tells your nervous system there’s no bear at the door: it’s safe enough to return. You don’t have to eliminate these parts—just learn to partner with them constructively.

The next time you notice yourself drifting away—mind fog, losing minutes, sound fading—pause and try your grounding routine: feet on the ground, touch something real, and scan the room with your senses. Gently thank the part that checked you out for trying to help. Then, bring your focus back to what’s happening around you, using a short list of sights or sensations as your anchor. The more you practice, the quicker you’ll spot and steer through dissociation, giving yourself an exit ramp to rejoin the present. Keep a grounding object handy and use this as your go-to the moment you feel yourself start to fade.