Why trusting 'universal' rules leads to unnecessary stress and less effective decisions

You’re sitting in the doctor’s office, clutching a brochure with a nervous thumb, the fluorescent lights humming above you. On the list: no caffeine, no sushi, absolutely no cold cuts. The rules feel endless, and with each one, your anxiety rises. But then you notice your best friend, who’s also expecting, sipping a post-dinner espresso with a gentle shrug, her mother mentioning how 'everyone ate cheese back in Sweden.' The contradiction leaves you baffled—and a little annoyed.

As the weeks go by, the rules pile up—one friend swears by a prenatal yoga ban, another says chocolate is off-limits. None of it seems to match your own needs, and it’s stressful trying to keep tabs. You start to ask, “What’s the reason for this?” But when you probe further, sometimes your doctor gives you a number, sometimes a vague ‘just to be safe.’ You poke around online and notice global recommendations differ wildly. Why? Who’s right?

Gradually, you’re emboldened to test the process yourself. You love coffee, so you dive into the data. Turns out, a modest amount is safe. You decide to keep your morning cup and immediately feel less deprived—sleep’s a bigger issue, anyway. Over time, your confidence grows, and you challenge other rules, one by one, tailoring each decision to your personal priorities and the actual risks.

This approach draws on the principles of decision science and behavioral economics, recognizing that effective choices combine reliable information with personal valuation. When you personalize instead of blindly following rules, anxiety drops, satisfaction rises, and you reclaim agency in your care.

Start with one guideline you have taken for granted—maybe it’s the rule against coffee or the warning about salads. Ask yourself what fear or risk the rule targets and see if you can find a concrete reason or scientific study behind it. Weigh how much that activity or habit matters in your daily life, considering your personal needs. Then, choose to either follow the rule as is, adapt it to fit your reality, or let it go entirely—whatever feels right and supported. Pay attention to how even a small act of tailoring rules to you can dramatically reduce stress and boost your sense of control. Try this approach with just one rule today, and see how your confidence grows.