Use this envy-prevention system to make people loyal and proud of you.
from The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism by Olivia Fox Cabane
The best way to avoid envy is to make people feel they had an impact on you. They made you. They are responsible for your success. They built you. If you do this, they will care about you.
How to Apply This
From time to time, write an email or call people that you think may be jealous of your success. Use this framework to compose the message:
-
Justification.
Create an excuse to contact this person, for example, “I was talking to Ben, and it reminded me of you.” -
Appreciation.
Thank the person for all they have done for you. Sometimes it might be difficult to find something that you could thank them for. Think hard, there is almost always something. -
Lay it all out.
Demonstrate exactly how the person helped you, for example, “I know you didn’t have to do…” -
Impact.
Tell them how much of a positive impact it had on you. -
Responsibility.
The previous four steps will make them feel responsible for you. Give them as much credit as you can.
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