Highlight another person's strengths when you can.
The Pygmalion effect is known to show that expectations of others make them become a self-fulfilling prophecy. For example, saying someone is really good at math when they’re actually average will make them become a better math student. Why? Simply due to the expectation you placed on them, they want to prove you’re right about them. Also, by highlighting others’ strengths in conversations with others, the positive attributes you prescribe to them rub off on you!
Find others’ strengths and tell them or others about those strengths.
Don’t just try to flatter them with some random compliment about their hair. Try to find out what they do or what really stands out about them and give them credit for it!
Examples straight from the book:
- “You know everyone—you must be a great networker!”
- “I’m amazed by your dedication to this organization—they are lucky to have you.”
- “You are so knowledgeable in this subject—thank goodness you are here.”
Make sure you also tell others while introducing them how great/skilled they are. You will not only make them look good, but you as well!
- “This is Mac; he’s a professional freelance designer who makes killer flyers you won’t see anywhere else!”
- “Wow, you’re a singer. I bet you’re really great. My brother Adrian is a superb composer who makes beats you can’t beat! I think you two could make amazing songs together.”