Figure out someone's appreciation language to give them the praise they crave.
The Five Love Languages were created by Dr. Gary Chapman, a relationship therapist. He found most couples and relationships suffer if there are misunderstandings in the Five Love Languages. Knowing people’s love languages can help you better praise your employees or bosses and create more harmonious and more connected relationships, both in work and personal relationships. Everyone has a different love language, and it’s crucial to get it right, or you’ll end up either making them feel disappointed, angry, or misunderstood.
- Find out people’s appreciation languages with questioning and behavioral cues.
Here are a couple questions to start investigating which appreciation language they have: “What was the nicest thing you’ve ever done for someone?” “How do you celebrate your accomplishments?” “What’s your favorite activity to do on the weekends?” “What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?”
Here are some behavioral cues to look for:
- They touch your arm or give hugs often (physical touch).
- They leave thank-you notes on your desk or send longer texts than average (words of affirmation).
- They love to spend time with you or hang around your office for chit-chat (quality time).
- They bring you gifts from their travels or usually get you a gift for all occasions (gifts).
- They feel satisfied helping you out, like cooking up a meal instead of ordering take-out (acts of service).