Accept unpleasant thoughts and emotions without resistance


  1. Defuse your unpleasant thoughts.
    Use the following methods to alter your perspective on your thoughts:
     - Detach from your thoughts - Insert the phrase "I am having a thought" before any negative thoughts about yourself. Instead of "I am incapable," think "I have the thought that I am incapable."
     -Silly voice technique - Choose a thought that disturbs you, then choose a cartoon character with a funny voice like Mickey Mouse or a character from a fantasy movie, such as Darth Vader, and say that disturbing/humiliating thought with that voice. The goal of the technique is to stop taking a negative thought or emotion so seriously.
     -Is this thought helpful? - Ask yourself if your unpleasant thoughts are useful—if they bring you closer to a more fulfilled life, help you to become the person you want to be, live by your values, and change your life for the better. If the answer is no, don't waste your time on those thoughts anymore; just let them pass.

  2. Make room for unpleasant emotions and thoughts.
    To make room for your emotions, stop fighting and analyzing them. Instead, observe them—let judgemental thoughts about your feelings pass, and focus on the sensations in your body that your emotions bring. For example, you might feel a tightness in your chest, a pounding heart, or something in your stomach—observe these sensations objectively like a curious scientist. Then take a deep breath and allow these emotions and sensations to pass through your body instead of resisting them.

  3. Use the “observing self” to notice your thoughts and emotions.
    Drop all judgmental thoughts and focus on the facts. Objectively describe what you feel and think without attaching importance, judging, or making conclusions about yourself. Describe facts about your current mental and emotional state without judgment.


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