How to Apply Bad Therapy: Why the Kids Aren't Growing Up
Why decades of therapy, diagnosis, and gentle parenting left kids more anxious, not less
About This Book
A twelve-year-old goes to urgent care for a stomachache and is asked, in private, whether he's thought about killing himself. A famous drug-education program leaves teens more likely to use drugs, not less. A morning classroom circle sends half a class home in tears before the math lesson even starts. Journalist Abigail Shrier, author of Irreversible Damage, spent years questioning parents, teachers, and the field's own leading psychologists to ask an uncomfortable question: what if the therapy, diagnosis, and gentle parenting poured into an entire generation of American kids have made them more anxious, not less? What she found is stranger, and more damning, than you'd expect.About the Author
Abigail Shrier is a journalist and the author of Irreversible Damage, a previous book on youth mental health that grew out of hundreds of conversations with American parents. Those conversations left her troubled by how much therapy children were receiving, how completely parents had come to rely on therapists to fix their kids, and how often a diagnosis changed a child's sense of who she was. She has written for the Wall Street Journal, where she profiled psychologist Jean Twenge on related generational shifts. For this book, she interviewed dozens of psychologists, psychiatrists, teachers, and parents across the country.
Biggest Takeaway
Listen to this and you'll start asking sharper questions before agreeing to any diagnosis, therapy, or accommodation for your child, or yourself. You'll recognize when a well-meaning check-in on someone's feelings is actually making things worse, and know when to redirect toward action instead. You'll be able to spot the difference between a study that describes a population and one that can diagnose an individual. You'll set firmer, warmer boundaries with your own kids without needing an expert's permission to do it. And you'll walk into your next parent-teacher conference or therapy consultation able to ask exactly the question that separates real help from harm.
Key Insights from This Book
Explore the most important ideas and learn how to apply them in your life.
The medical word for when the cure itself becomes the injury
More therapy became available everywhere and depression rates never fell
A child psychologist who turns away most parents begging for help
Why checking in on your feelings might make you feel worse
One morning circle question that made a whole class cry before math
A childhood trauma theory that can explain literally any adult problem
The Halloween joke that got a Jewish teenager accused of antisemitism
He wouldn't buy new sandals until his son found the old ones
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